Kelly Flowers


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Shaun White I Am Not – Resolution ✅

So I made a goal at the beginning of 2017 to do a snowboard jump.  I wasn’t looking to launch from a rail or crouching-tiger-fly off a berm like the punks that snowboard in jeans and don’t bother to wear gloves. I just wanted to leave the ground. A liiiiittle air.

Now, you might not have guessed it, but I was more of a reader growing up. Shocking, I know. Snowboarding is something I learned as an adult when you’re smart and scared like you should be and when you can really kill yourself. So the idea of doing a snowboard jump terrified me, as it should any life-appreciating adult, especially one with my ability in sports.

And that’s why I made this goal. Because I want to be a little terrified. And let’s be honest, I really want to look cool someday.

You know what? (Cue celebration dance…) I did it! More than once! And I crashed. (…Cue awkward dance freeze) More than once. 😕

snowboard-failTroy is now doing simple tasks for me, like removing my shoes. (So embarrassing.) I can’t sneeze without seizing in pain. Zipping my suitcase was excruciating. And no amount of ibuprofen and red wine makes rolling over less torturous. I know. I’ve tried.

But each time I wince or whimper, inside I give myself one of those cocky little smiles.

sourceBecause 1… no broken bones (yay me) and 2… next time, I’m going to get more than 4 inches off the ground.

When you don’t grow up playing sports, you miss a valuable world lesson. Risk and pain are part of the process. Yeah yeah you say, blah blah blah. But this was lost on me before. Crashing on a snowboard (i.e. catapulted forward so fast you can’t breathe because your lungs have been freight-trained) is the most definitive form of failure. What do you do then? You get up, laugh at yourself, curse at yourself because laughing hurts like a b**** and then do it again.

Because one does not reach a level of prowess by being smart, rational and cautious. Sometimes, you have to get the wind knocked out of you.

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“Resolutions” Never Work

(I started this blog a couple of days ago and then, well… you know, I put it aside. Procrastination, you old nemesis! 2017 is going to be on your a$$!)

Pre-New Year’s Eve Post

Now is a good time to eat pie. Because pretty soon, my New Year resolutions won’t allow it. After the cooking and serving and saran-wrapping, you can’t see the fridge light. And then, eating leftovers becomes a bit of a goal. Each Tupperware emptied, an accomplishment. You can see how this line of thinking gets out of hand. I am nothing if not goal-oriented, for some suuuper important things, like emptying the fridge.

Soon will NOT be the time to eat pie, it will be to deny thyself. Whether it be donuts, laziness or procrastination, the New Year is about doing what you don’t want to do (like an early morning run) and not doing what you want to do (like eat ice cream and watch Westworld until 2am). Ah, the constant battle that divides doers and, well, non-doers.

I’m ready (after I finish this piece of pie) to hit the ground running. I’ll spend the next couple of days writing what I call resolutions but are really goals. There’s an important difference. Resolutions say “do better”. Goals say “here is a step to do better”. So I don’t do resolutions. I DO goals. But I really like the word “resolution” so I still use it.

Now it’s time to flurry into action putting away my Clark Griswold Christmas because 2017 doesn’t have room for that kind of chaos! Continue reading